What is Love?

Some years ago, a well-known singer titled a song, “What Does Love Have to Do with It?” The lyrics proceeds to say that love is just a secondhand emotion! This is the farthest from the truth. Love has everything to do with the state of our health and wellbeing. The acronym “ILL”, denotes I Lack Love.

 Many who are stricken with illness, emotionally and or physically, have allowed hatred, resentment and bitterness to erode their health. The body generates toxic hormones when the mind and spirit is held in a state of bitterness and resentment. When we make a conscious decision to forgive and love unconditionally, our spirit, mind and body is filled with joy, peace and love.

According to a growing body of scientific research love come with some solid health benefits:

Love makes you happy. Love increases dopamine, the feel-good brain chemical associated with reward. Love is a mood intensifier, so people feel extremely positive and very appreciated. 

Love ease anxiety. Loneliness can hurt your health from increasing inflammation to activating pain centers. “The feeling of loneliness stimulates anxiety, cortisol and adrenaline levels rise when people feel insecure and threatened. Being in love and feeling close to another person can mitigate anxiety.

Love helps you live longer. Research has shown that married couples enjoy greater longevity than singles — making “’til death do us part” even more of a commitment. Studies suggest those long-life benefits are largely explained by consistent social and emotional support, better adherence to medical care and having a partner who can hold you accountable to healthy lifestyle behaviors and steer you away from bad ones. Married couples have been found to have lower rates of substance abuse, lower blood pressure and less depression than single peers.

Love is a healer.   God is Love. The key to healing and wholeness comes from the One who created us. Without the presence of True Love (agape love), there’s a large void in a person’s life. I will refer to this void as a “God size hole”. Many people attempt to fill this “hole” with people, food, drugs, alcohol, material things, money, power or fame. My personal identity and relationship in Christ fills, the God size hole, I can truly say that there is no hatred in my heart! I love people unconditionally, the agape kind of love.

 Love is eloquently described and quoted by the great Apostle Paul: Love suffers long andis kind; Love does not envy; Love does not parade itself, Love is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, Love does not seek its own, Love is not provoked, Love thinks no evil; Lovedoes not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never fails!
 

To Your Health and Happiness,

Dot High-Steed is a Life Coach, who has over 25 years of experience in health/wellness, business and education. 

Dot may be reached at: 

oneononewdot@yahoo.com 

https://www.successunlimitedwdot.com  

https://www.facebook.com/success2050

Speak to the MOUNTAIN!

In this life you will have problems, there is not a person on the planet that will not have challenges and problems to overcome. Our goal in life is not to avoid problems, unexpected or expected problems and challenges will happen. Our goal is to have the wisdom and knowledge on how to solve and or overcome our problems. Many times people spend useless time and effort talking about the problem (s). This can be in the form of complaining, gossiping, speaking fear, anger or doubt; which only compounds the situation.  The problem(s) will take on a life of its own and begin to dominate your thoughts, causing negative and destructive behaviors, such as overeating, depression, excessive alcohol use, drug use (legal and illegal).  

You may say, “Dot, you do not know the BIG problem I am dealing with, it seems like there is no end or no way out!”  “What can I do?”  I am glad you asked that question.  My answer …… SPEAK TO YOUR MOUNTAIN!Your mountain is any challenge or problem that is overwhelming, seems insurmountable. Your words are a powerful force, they can create and they can tear down. The Bible says “The power of life and death is in the tongue”. The tongue is like a rudder on a ship, it can direct you to achieve your dreams and life goals. If you say you can do it, you will, if you say you can’t, you will not.

This may seem over simplified, but in reality, what you say about your problems and what you believe, have more impact than what others say or believe concerning your situation. Say to the Mountain, “Move”! I am not saying that you should avoid seeking help from others, but ultimately you must believe in your God-given ability to overcome victoriously. It’s important to know that you can transform a seemingly impossible task or problem by speaking to it. You may say… “I will not be destroyed by this problem, I have the ability to overcome.”   

 Being a woman of faith, I speak to my problem (s), (Mountains), in this manner… “I Can Do All Things through Christ who strengthen me”. When challenged with a health concern… I speak, “I walk in Divine health and wholeness”. We are not to deny the fact that the symptoms are there, but deny its right to remain in your body. A favorite verse of mine:“Then Jesus told them, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith and don't doubt, you can do things like this and much more. You can even say to this mountain, 'May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea,' and it will happen”.

I will summarize with a reminder that we are spirit, soul and body. The soul (mind, will and emotions), if not kept in checked, can cause havoc to the body and weaken our spirits. We must speak to the MOUNTAIN, words of peace, calm, faith and rid our thoughts of doubt, fear and unbelief. It’s important first to rid your mind of negative thoughts, take every negative thought captive and cast it out. Thoughts are seeds, which become actions and actions create destiny. 

Say to the Mountain “Move”!

To Your Health and Happiness!

                                                                      Take Care of Yourself         Part II of II

Last week’s column highlighted the importance of Self-Care. I mentioned that caring for yourself does not negate our responsibility to serve and care for others. But you cannot help others if you are not “whole” yourself.  “Whole” refers to being strong physically, mentally and spiritually. 

Here are a few tips on how you can take care of you: 

1. Exercise your body. A little exercise will go a long way to reducing stress. Even just a brisk walk in the morning will energize and motivate you for the day ahead. Set your alarm for a little earlier than usual and hit the pavement or the treadmill. Save time by preparing the night before. Lay out your exercise clothes so that you can get going with minimal preparation time.
2. A brief morning meditation.  I personally use biblical mediations. Think about all the things you are grateful for and give yourself some positive encouragement. A favorite Bible verse of mine. “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you”.
3. Keep a journal. Writing is a therapeutic activity. In just a few minutes, you can write down your thoughts, worries, gratitude, or whatever else comes to mind. Keep the journal near your bed and make a habit of writing a few paragraphs or even sentences each night before you go to sleep. 
4. Read a book. Reading is a relaxing activity that helps us escape from the pressures of our lives and expands our intellectual abilities. 
5. Call an old friend. Reconnect with someone you haven’t had time to talk to in a while. Busy lives get in the way of friendship. Friends become distant memories. In the social media age, people tend to keep track of friends through various social media sites, but rarely ever pick up the phone.
6. Schedule time for yourself. When we fill out our calendars for the day, we usually don’t schedule in time for ourselves. Schedule time for some exercise, and quality time with family and friends.
7. Unplug from technology. People tend to grab their phone first thing when waking up. Leave the electronics alone until you’ve given yourself time to prepare for the day. Make time for breakfast (the most important meal of the day).
8. Prepare healthy meals at home. We can control the nutritional value of our meal if we prepare our meals. Frequent dining out is not always healthy, avoid the fast food trap.
9. Get enough sleep. Sleep is not only good for the body, but it is also good for the mind. A well-rested body and mind can accomplish great things. 

    10.   Stay connected to others, especially your love ones. Social distancing does not mean    social disconnection!Make frequent contacts by phone, text, email, skype and   other technical modes or the old fashion; write a note and put it in the mail. Social connection is crucial to good mental health.

Remind yourself that you are fabulous, you are an amazing person! Take time each day to nurture and care for yourself. No one will take care of you like you. Do it for your body, mind and spirit!

To Your Health and Happiness,

The True Reason for the Christmas Season

Christmas is a time for the celebration of the birth of Christ, “Christ-mas” is a two-part word; Christ (the Anointed One) and Mass(a service which is sometimes called Communion or Eucharist) as Christians we remember that Jesus came to earth died for us and then came back to life to save us. Billions of people celebrate Christmas around the world, the majority are people like myself, who celebrate for religious purpose. For others, the celebration is centered around commercialism. 

Gift giving is a big part of the Christmas season. Many people will spend large sum of money to buy gifts for family and friends. The commercialization of Christmas entices us to spend hundreds and thousands of dollars on gifts, some will spend money they do not have, in other words; incurring debt that could take years to pay off.  I encourage each of us to pause and reflect on the “true reason” for the season and on the truth behind gift giving.  The Gospels states that the Wise Men, who were distinguished, wealthy foreigners, visited the baby Jesus after his birth, bearing giftsof gold, frankincense and myrrh. As you open your beautiful wrapped presents this Christmas remember it all started with a celebration of Jesus birth!

The Creator of the Universe demonstrated His love for us by sending His only begotten Son 

in the form of a baby borne unto a Virgin, named Mary. The scriptures continue, “Whosoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life”! What great love displayed by our Lord! This is the miracle of Christmas. 

As we safely gather with our families and friends during this Christmas, let’s us not forget the “true reason” for our celebrations.  God’s desire is that we will come to the full knowledge of His Divine purpose and accept His “Gift” and be eternally united to His family! The “Gift of Jesus” is the true reason for the season.

This has been a most challenging year with the pandemic, political and social unrest, loss of love one’s, loss of jobs and coupled with the increase in stress and anxiety. What better time to look to the Creator of the Universe for peace, love and good tidings.!

May His Face shine upon you and bring you peace and joy.

Have a Blessed Merry Christmas!

What is Wellness?

Wellness is to assume responsibility for the quality of your life. It begins with a conscious decision to shape a healthy lifestyle. Wellnessis the complete integration of body, mind and spirit---the realization that everything we do, think, feel and believe has an effect on our state of well-being. Wellnessis an alternative dependency on doctors, drugs, to complacency, to mediocrity and to self-pity, boredom and slothfulness.Wellnessis an Attitude.  

To best describe wellness, I will share a traumatic personal experience which occurred more than thirty years ago….

As a young adult, I worked as a shift supervisor for a major manufacturing corporation in Augusta, Georgia.  One evening while at work, I entered a storage room, which had a large wooden overhead door, it was 12-14 feet high and weighed 600 pounds. As I came under the door, that evening, the door mechanism broke and it came crashing down, full force on top of my head. You don’t have to be a scientist to calculate that the weight and force was enough to have killed me. It was a miracle that I survived.  After a brief stay in the hospital, doctors did not find any broken bones, but I was left with excruciating pain in my head and neck, along with shattered emotions (due to fear of not recovering).

Before the accident I was your typical couch potato. Exercise was the farthest thing from my mind even though I was overweight, I was not motivated to exercise. After the accident, I experienced chronic pain and had difficulty relaxing the muscles in my shoulders and neck.  For more than six months, I went from doctor to doctor in search of relief and a strong desire to return to “normal”. I was on my way up the corporate ladder. The fear of not reaching my career goals and being crippled for life intensified the physical and emotional pain. 

My friends said that I would never recover and that I should sue the company. There was clear negligence for failure to fix the overhead door. I later learned that key personnel knew the door was faulty prior to my accident. But my desire was not to sue the company, I only wanted be “well” and to get on with my life and career. I was not looking for a “free ride".

To help with the pain and anxiety, doctors prescribed various pain killers and antidepressant drugs. But my emotional state worsens; the root of the depression was fear of not recovering. The company provided the finest medical care, but I did not want to be dependent on prescription drugs for the rest of my life. I was determined to be drug free!

One day I went to visit a psychologist; I will refer to him as an “Angel” sent by God. This “Angel Doctor” told me that he jogged for relaxation. I looked at him in disbelief and asked “you do what to relax?” He described how exercise helps the body and mind relieve stress. Up to this point, I had associated exercise as hard work, certainly not therapeutic or fun. Well I was desperate to try something besides prescription drugs. I went out bought a pair of athletic shoes and began to walk. 

As I walked around my neighborhood, I began to not only feel better, I was having fun. A short time later, while walking, I met a friend who motivated me to begin jogging. Within five months I was completely free of prescription drug, started teaching aerobics classes and participating in 10k road races. The rest is history, I became “sold out” on the benefits of exercise as a means to heal, and become well.  Other benefits of my new healthy lifestyle included weight loss, improve attitude, and increased energy.

 Now that I looked back on this accident, it was indeed my wake-up call to my life mission; which is to educate, and inspire others to improve their health and well-being. Wellness is a focus on the whole person, spirit, mind and body! Stay tune next week for part II.

To Your Health and Happiness,

Dot High-Steed is a Life Coach, who has over 25 years of experience in health/wellness, ministry, business and education. 

Dot may be reached at:  

oneononewdot@yahoo.com

https://www.successunlimitedwdot.com  

https://www.facebook.com/success2050

To Everything There’s a Season 

We all experience change and transition in life. Sometimes life is exciting, dynamic, and we feel on top of the world. And then just as natural seasons changes, our world can be turned upside down in an instant!

Life changes and transitions can be tough. Life seems to operate in seasons. Some parts of life are like spring: new beginnings, a fresh start, a brand-new job, or a creative opportunity. Starting things always feels so exciting, so invigorating, and so hopeful. Summer is when the living seems easier. Relationships are thriving, work seems effortless, and the pleasant days are long. Autumn brings a cool, refreshing change, but always a reminder of days lost and the reminder of what lies ahead. 

Life changes makes us remember (and long for) the past; we leave friends for a new chapter, say goodbye to a loved one, or move for another opportunity. And then, as certain as ever, winter arrives. The cold, bitter harshness of a season that tests the fortitude of us all. It poses the question: how strong are you?

When life's winter seasons fall upon you—through the loss of a loved one, the end of a great chapter in your life, or the termination of something you couldn't imagine ending—many times, we are overcome with grief. How did this happen? How long will this endure? Will I survive? Am I strong enough?

Winter has a way of testing the resolve of people, rewarding those with grit and determination with the hope of spring. When you find yourself in life's winter moments, here are three things you can do during this season of life.

1. Be Intentional. Purposely set your mind to be positive. Tell yourself “this winter season will not define me; this too shall pass”. Spring is on its way!

2. Trust your own resolve. You're a lot stronger than you think. Remind yourself of how you overcame past obstacles and strive to be even stronger. 

3. Tough times do not last, tough people do. Tough situations can add to our story and build character. Remember to surround yourself with supportive relationships and take care of yourself.

4. Understand the time and season. There are some people who are in your life only for a season.   Trying to hold on to friendship past the season causes the relationship to sour. 

King Solomon of the Bible understood life seasons, he wrote:

To everything there is a season,

A time for every purpose under heaven:  A time to be born,

And a time to die; A time to plant,

And a time to pluck what is planted; A time to kill,

And a time to heal; A time to break down,

And a time to build up; A time to weep,

And a time to laugh; A time to mourn,

And a time to dance;

 A time to cast away stones, And a time to gather stones;

A time to embrace,

And a time to refrain from embracing; A time to gain,

And a time to lose; A time to keep,

And a time to throw away; A time to tear,

And a time to sew; A time to keepsilence,

And a time to speak; A time to love,

And a time to hate; A time of war,

And a time of peace.

Let the peace of the Lord rule in your heart.

To Your Health and Happiness1

The Healing Power of Love

In our present day, many people are spurring bitterness and hatred based on differences in cultures, race, political views, religion and any other excuses they may find to justify their anger. We must come to a place to agree to disagree, for the sake of our children and their children and their children. We must pray and believe for civility, respect and peace for our Nation. It’s time to heal. Healing starts with our individual selves. It’s nearly impossible to help, and have empathy for others past your own disillusion and pain. If today you are hurting emotionally or physically, I have good news! The love of Christ can heal all hurts. True love for ourselves and for others can only be manifested through our love for Christ.God is Love.The Bible states in John 3:16, “ForGod so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life”. This includes having a good life here and now!

I am reminiscing a popular song, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love It's the only thing that there's just too little of What the world needs now is love, sweet love, No not just for some but for everyone. These beautiful lyrics initially sang by Jackie DeShannon more than 55 years ago still rings true today! The world needs more love, our country needs more love, we need more love! 

The healing power of Love can bring our Nation together. We are not Blue or Red, Republican or Democrats, these are only labels that we temporarily bestow upon ourselves to express our values. In the larger picture, we are all humans with the same needs and wants, with a desire to be fulfilled with love and peace.

A house divided cannot stand, a Nation divided cannot stand. We are the United States of America, the greatest country on earth. Let’s live up to our Pledge… We are one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

The second paragraph of the United States Declaration of Independence starts as follows: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. 

The Bibles states, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

May the Lord bless you, May His face shine upon you and give you peace!

God Bless America!
 

Dot High-Steed is a Life Coach, who has over 25 years of experience in health/wellness, business and education. 

Dot may be reached at:  

oneononewdot@yahoo.com

https://www.successunlimitedwdot.com  

https://www.facebook.com/success2050

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month

At this time, many people are fearful and anxious with the events surrounding COVID-19. This unseen enemy has affected our livelihoods and wellbeing. During these time of uncertainty, I want to appeal to you to care for and protect our most vulnerable citizens, our children. The data is conclusive that when there is a major crisis, in this case a world pandemic, child abuse increases. Many parents are overwhelmed with the need to provide food and shelter, in light of being unemployed/ underemployed and they are required to homeschool with little or no training. Not in our recent history have children and teens been sheltered in their homes with little or no physical contact with their extended family, friends and teachers. This makes for a potential toxic and harmful environment for innocent children who depend on their parents and other caring adults for a healthy existence.

Children’s limited outside contact with others inhibits the detection of abuse. Schools have personnel who are trained to detect and report child abuse. The latest reports in the media indicates that child abuse is sadly increasing. No child deserves to be hurt or neglected. We know also well that children are violently injured physically, emotionally and killed by the hands of their parents and or caretakers. According to TexProtects, in Texas, more than 3 children die from abuse or neglect on average every week, 182children are confirmed victims daily, and more than 7 children are maltreated every hour.

There are four basic types of child abuse. Children being abused are likely to experience more than just one type of abuse: 

1. Neglect:Failure to provide for a child’s basic physical, medical, or emotional needs. Leaving a young child home alone or failing to provide needed medical care may also be considered neglect. Over 80% of child abuse cases in Texas and in the U.S. are the result of neglect.
2. Physical Abuse:A physical injury that results in substantial harm to the child, such as bruises, fractures, or death. It also can include a genuine threat of harm even if there is no visible injury.
3. Emotional Abuse: An action that results in a marked impact on a child's growth, development, or psychological functioning. Emotional abuse includes extreme forms of punishment such as confining a child in a dark closet, habitual scapegoating, or belittling to the point that it results in noticeable effects on the child's daily functioning.
4. Sexual Abuse: Sexual conduct harmful to a child's mental, emotional, or physical welfare. This includes fondling a child’s genitals, penetration, indecent exposure, and exploitation through prostitution or producing pornography.

How you can help?

1. If you see or suspect child abuse call the child abuse hotline: 1800 -252-5400.
2. Check in on your family, friends and neighbors with school age children offer assistance when it’s feasible.
3. Volunteer your time in schools and community based organization who provide vital services for our children.
4. Support legislation that provide the legal support to protect our children. 
5. Always provide love and care to children. They are precious to God and to the future of our world. 

Partial Reprint: TexProtects.org 

Stay Safe and Healthy,

Dot

Many of us are stuck at home due to the "Shelter in Place", "Stay at Home" mandate because of the coronavirus outbreak. This disruption in our daily routines can cause much anxiety and depression, heightened by layoffs and loss of income. 

Here are a few do's and don’ts’s to survival during this time:

Do maintain a schedule close to the pre-virus schedule

Do get plenty of sleep. Avoid staying up late and sleeping in late.

Do reach out to family, friends and co-workers through social media. FaceTime, ZOOM, and the "old fashioned" phone calls!

Do eat healthy and exercise daily. This is an excellent time to go outside and walk (maintain the social distancing).

Do something new! Those ideas and projects you have wanted to do, but did not have time. Now is the time.

Do keep your trust in the Lord! Isaiah 40:31 But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.

Don’t' over think and worry. Matthew 6:27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? 

Don't isolate yourself from others. Especially those that are close to you. Ecclesiastes 4:9 Two is better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.

Don't over eat and or veg out in front of the television. Watching too much television can increase anxiety and depression with all of the reporting on the virus. 

Don't use drugs and alcohol as a means to escape. 

I hope this helps you as it is helping me to bring peace and stability during this difficult time. "This too shall pass". Keep the faith.

To Your Health and Safety!

In Times of Uncertainty…..

There is an invisible enemy among us! Namely, COVID-19, or more commonly called the Coronavirus. As many of you are aware we have in the past faced national emergencies, seen and unseen. To name a few, HIV/AIDS, Ebola, Swine Flu, and 9/11. The commonality that we have manifested throughout these difficult times, is that we grow closer as human beings, we grow closer and stronger as a Nation. During these difficult and uncertain times, as Americans; we not only seek help and protection for ourselves but for others. As a Nation, we are strong and resilient because of our reliance on the Divine sovereignty of God. We must continue to stand strong and committed to words spoken by our 16^thPresident Abraham Lincoln, “A house divided against itself cannot stand.” United we stand, divided we fall”.

We are all faced with massive uncertainty as we face the constant change to our daily lives: School and business closures, social distancing, workplace layoffs, restricted travel, just to name a few! We have never been in a situation like the coronavirus is presenting us with. When faced with much uncertainty, it is a rather normal human response to go into at least some degree of fear and anxiety.  Some of you may even be experiencing panic. We try to understand “why” this happening and make some sense out of it with our minds to give ourselves some degree of certainty and safety.  Attempting to figure it out is not the highest use of your mental energy. We must trust in the Lord and follow the orders and recommendations of our local, state and Federal government to help conquer this hidden enemy!  There is no need for panic and uncontrolled anxiety. “This too shall pass.”

To quote President Franklin Roosevelt, “This great Nation will endure as it has endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. In every dark hour of our national life a leadership of frankness and vigor has met with that understanding and support of the people themselves which is essential to victory. I am convinced that you will again give that support to leadership in these critical days”. “These dark days will be worth all they cost us if they teach us that our true destiny is not to be ministered unto but to minister to ourselves and to our fellow men”.  

Verses from my favorite Biblical passage: “Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. For He will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease”. The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name”.
    

To Your Health and Happiness!